I've found this beautiful song.
The lyrics are so pertinent to me, especially right now.

Faith is a choice.




The voice of truth

Oh, what I would do
To have the kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in
Onto the crashing waves

To step out of my comfort zone
Into the realm of the unknown
Where Jesus is,
And he's holding out his hand

But the waves are calling out my name and they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times I've tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me time and time again
"Boy, you'll never win, you'll never win."

But the voice of truth tells me a different story
the voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the voice of truth says "this is for my glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth


Oh, what I would do to have the kind of strength it takes
To stand before a giant with just a sling and a stone
Surrounded by the sound of a thousand warriors shaking in their armor
Wishing they'd have had the strength to stand

But the giant's calling out my name and he laughs at me
Reminding me of all the times I've tried before and failed
The giant keeps on telling me time and time again
"Boy you'll never win, you'll never win."

But the voice of truth tells me a different story
the voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the voice of truth says "this is for my glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe
the voice of truth

but the stone was just the right size
to put the giant on the ground
and the waves they don't seem so high
from on top of them looking down
i will soar with the wings of eagles
when i stop and listen to the sound of
Jesus singing over me

But the voice of truth tells me a different story
The voice of truth says do not be afraid
And the voice of truth says this is for my glory
Out of all the voices calling out to me (calling out to me)
I will choose to listen and believe (I will choose to listen and believe)
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth
I will listen and believe
I will listen and believe
the voice of truth
I will listen and believe
'Causes Jesus you are the voice of truth
And I will listen to you..

I asked for a tree, and you gave me a forest.
I asked for a drop of water, and you gave me an ocean.

Today's like a breath of fresh air for me.
The simple joys of family time is prove, that the best things in life come free.
I came home a little late today,
so only mummmy was left at the table, but it was such an enjoyable meal because we were laughing ourselves silly over a funny incident about my brother and his lost spectacles. I've never seen my mum laughing so hard before! xD
I was half laughing at her laughing rather than at the joke itself! =P
So that was dinner.

It emerged as a wild idea -- a suggestion for a bicycle ride in the park.
But my cousins, sister and I soon found ourselves whizzing up and down the neighbourhood and the nearby park. I went for 3 full rounds, twice with my sister in the rear and once with cousin Juvelia instead. Woooooooots... it felt so good going up and down the slopes.
And all of it reminded me so nostalgically of the good ole days at ECP and that wild bicycle adventure with Shi Hui.
I love crusing along at great bicycle speeds, making smooth turns and feeling my heart drop to the bottom of my stomach at the road humps. Really got some adrenaline rushing through us xD

Looking back now, the past 4 hours ave been priceless.
Price-less and Priceless. =)
Oh well, it's back to intensive work now,
my mum will be taking part in a prayer marathon as part of the alpha course project.
She'll be doing the 1am-2am timeslot.
Jia You mummy!!! =D

To cry to love to hate to try
to live again...

Bravo bravo, to an extremely fulfilling day.
I'd really like to thank everyone for remembering my birthday, and sending me simple but heart-warming messages. I think the fact that the effort taken to remember the day and send a simple sms alone, really melts my heart.
For all the simple delights, big and small, they were all so thoughtful.
Thank you all, so very much.

Someone once asked me if I ever felt it a pity that my birthday happens to fall on a school holiday, since it's easily forgotten, and people don't usually take the trouble to get a gift at all, when the gift can't be passed to me on the actual day.
Well, I don't think so, because here's one person who finds it a great challenge herself to remember birthday dates! It's really such a wonder how names, birthdays and related infomation about people around me seem to slip through the recesses of my mind like jelly on a fork!
In my wildest dreams, I imagine possessing halogram-glasses. So that when I wear this glasses, an infomation bar hovers over the heads of everyone I see, and tells me the names, the birthdays, the favourite ice-cream flavours and all the rest of a treasury of simple but precious infomation that means a lot to me.
It's so easy to forget a bunch of numbers that signifies a day in a 365-day calandar that means something special. So it's especially sweet for me, when someone shows he/she cares, just by remebering. =)

As usual, I spent the first 15 min of my new year thinking about where I am, who I am, what I treasure, and where do I go from here.
So many things came flooding to me, and I realise the past year has been the most challenging, out of all 15 I can say to have been previledged to go through.
But the past year has also been one of unprecedented growth, both within myself, and in the things around me.
I am greatly blessed.
So much have changed too, and as I take a fresh look at my world through re-newed lenses, I realise that I have done little, and there's much more see, much more to touch, smell, taste, hear.
And I am excited, to receive 3 new challenges.

Firstly,
and utmostly, I need to find pillar in my life. I don't want to go gadding about the world for all my life, doing everything, but accomplishing nothing.
For wise is the man who gazes at the stars all night, and discovers the twinkling dance of their shimmering,
but foolish is the one who counts each and every sand grain on the beach, yet sees nothing but dust and grime.
I want to make God and my family the focus and pillar of my life.

secondly,
I want to become more self-aware and develop my inner self to be more resilient.
The greatest of strengths come from within.
This year has taught me one great lesson: To change others, I must first change myself.
It is only when I am sure of what I stand for and who I am, that I can hope to make the slighest of a difference in the world around me.

Thirdly,
I want to have big and ridiculous dreams.
Thank you, Mr Boy for another inspiring CT session. The greatest chains that pin me down are those that I fasten upon myself through my fears and my expectations.
Too many a good opportunity has slipped past me because I doubted and restrained myself. This year, I shall learn, not only to flex my wings, but open new doors with a wide open heart and mind.

Here's the video clip that Mr Boy's shown to us.
It's about this guy who's always suffered from low self-esteem. He's a handphone seller who decided to overcome his fears and try out "Britain's got talent."
This decision has changed his life.






The lyrics are in Italian,
here is the translation: (Beautiful)


But my mystery is locked within me,
no-one shall know my name!
No, no, I shall say it as my mouth
meets yours when the dawn is breaking!

Vanish, o night!
Fade, stars!
At dawn I shall win




"Sometimes we restrain ourselves even before the world restricts us."

The strange thing is, the first thing I can think of saying is: wow.
Just wow.
Wow, how exciting it is to blog when the events are so tantalisingly recent,
just like a fresh pile of kangeroo dung.
Wow, how I have just witnessed the world, as I know it, blown up to pieces by nuclear warfare, through a replay button.

I thank the record and replay button.

But didn't everything lead so predictably to this?
The arms race,
The unresolved tensions,
the building nationalistic pride.
Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin and Churchill, the chess pieces were set long before tonight.

So we've had a bloodbath.
Or rather, a bloodbath concealed and revealed in horrific sequence.

3 blind men were led to an elephant and told to describe it as they felt.
The first man said, "it's long and flexible." He had the trunk.
The second man remarked:"it's firm and rough." He had a leg.
The third man exclaimed its resemblance to a paint brush. He had the tail.
Today, the blind fold has been lifted, and scence that greeted each poor man has done little more than make them wish their eyes are blissfully blind again.

3 tragedies I report tonight.

Firstly, and most importantly,
great treachery that has led to grave accusations and murky, sticky misunderstanding.
If I had known better, I wouldn't have been foolish enough to commit knowledge to one, frustratingly lacking the most primitive sense and primary intuition to honour a confidant.
The intention had been pure - simply to relieve, a poor soul from misplaced confidences.
Yet it appears now, that I have all along been the one with misplaced confidences.
I need to apologise to my best of intentions.

Secondly,
a problem of the same nature - the first problem, turned inside out.
So now we have even deeper a trench,
more tired an arm
and more sickened a will.

Thirdly,
an affirmation of my worst fears,
now the end is sure to come, uglier and faster.

The plot thickens